We met with Molly and Joni on Monday 1/31 at their office. It was a meeting to discuss our feelings and go over what communication changes need to be made (since me and derek haven't been happy with the way things have gone so far). Hopefully things will get better. To be honest, the only way to go is up at this point :o/ I explained to them that several other people have been interested in adoption and I have specifically told them not to go to choice network because of their horrible communication. They of course promised that things will get better. I really hope they do. We also found out that they are working with 21 potential birth moms. Not all these moms meet our criteria but it is nice to know they have some available. We are wanting a Caucasian infant, which means our wait will be longer (but we are completely ok with that). I guess Anna randomly found an adoptive family on her own and Nakita wants to parent (although she has a lot of barriers if she decides to parent, so she's not completely out of the picture). We'll see...
I did get a follow-up email from Molly and Joni on Fri. They just expressed how happy they were that we met and that things are now going in the right direction. I got a phone call from Joni later and she said they are working with a birthmom named Kirsten who is not sure if she wants to place her child up for adoption or not. She currently has a 17 mo old son but is having a girl in June. She is 60% leaning towards adoption and 40% leaning towards keeping the child. We are going to meet her on Friday. Definitely not getting our hopes up, but it's nice to know that she is on the boarder. I feel like we both have a bit of a wall up at this point, so we don't get hurt. Part of me is afraid it may take away from the experience but I think it's a natural reaction. I mentioned to Molly and Joni that it may be helpful for me and Derek to talk to another couple that has been through the same process that we have been through. I'm curious if they have had the same feelings and built the same walls.
Sweethearts I feel so helpless, all I can do is say that I love you both and I know how badly you both want this. I'm always going to be on your side. It's so hard for me, please have patience with me, I want to give you all the support you need...I'm just not sure totally of how. I will always be happy for my children to get what they want, it such an emotional roller coaster for you and for us too. We will do anything in our power to help you get threw this, once it's all over and you hold that baby in your arms all this turmoil will be in the past and only the future is what matters :) So I'll say a little prayer and when the time is right I'm sure everything will fall right into place like it suppose to and we will all be blessed! As said by Martin Luther King, Jr... Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase. So you’ve taken the first step….
ReplyDeleteOne foot in front of the other, over and over, day after day and soon we will all be rejoicing together!!